Couple taking photos.

“He doesn’t have the right to yell at me. I’m only his girlfriend, not his wife.”

“Boy, you are whipped. Better put your girl in place”

“ Girl, if he cheats on you, then you had the right to slap him”

  • How much do you know about relationship violence? Take this simple True/False questionnaire to test out your knowledge. Being male or female does not affect how you act in a relationship. True or False?
  • FALSE – sex and gender roles do affect how we act within our relationships. —It’s the 21st century, society no longer has an influence on relationships. True or False?
  • False – Society still affects our relationships by telling us what is right and wrong in our relationships and how males and females should act within them. —People in unhealthy relationships, do not affect others around them. True or False?
  • False – People in unhealthy relationships do affect those around them such as children. They may model after their parents and view unhealthy relationships as healthy..
  • Introduction
—How do you feel when you read or hear  the quotes above? What about these lyrics?

Just gonna stand there and watch me burn

Well that’s alright because I like the way it hurts

Just gonna stand there and hear me cry

Well, that’s alright because I love the way you lie

  • We may encounter them every day and not think twice about its meaning or realize the negative effects it has on us and our relationships. These lyrics reference gender scripts explaining that guys will stand there and watch the girls cry while the girls think that this type of behavior is “alright.” These types of lyrics express that agony and pain in a relationship is acceptable. There are different levels of hurt such as saying something you don’t mean, throwing objects, or physically hurting someone. However, there is a fine line in any relationship that should not be crossed. Relationships are not always rainbows and butterflies because every relationship has its own problems. It is not alright to be hurt and still feel that’s what relationships have to go through. These thoughts are embedded into society and our gender roles that may be viewed as normal if we do not take the time to carefully examine this issue.
  • Relationship violence also known as domestic violence or intimate partner violence comes in different forms and can happen to anyone.  We may see this in the media or even in our daily lives with people we may know. But have you ever wondered why people act the way they do in relationships and what makes it unhealthy?  Gender and social norms determine how males and females may act, speak, and dress in a relationship. This can also depend on the individual’s cultural and personal beliefs. Project TLC (Tough Love & Care)  focuses on these key issues and discuss how it affects relationship.
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